Let's Fight

I realized today that I pass up really good chances for fights. I can't explain why I don't dig in and go to verbal battle once in awhile. Most people do. For example, I have a doormat at the back door. It's not one of those really heavy ones, nor is it light enough to crumple up. The other day as my husband was coming through that door, he kind of tripped and had to catch himself. He said, "Damn! One of these days that rug is going to kill me!" What did I do? I shrugged my shoulders and gave it no more thought. I figure 1) I like the rug there as a welcome, 2) it isn't a hazard if you pick your feet up, 3) I don't need to say anything about it because I'm not going to move it, and 4) if I decide it really is a hazard, I'll just take it up and say no more. Well, you can see that I passed up a chance for a really good fight:
He: That damned rug is going to kill me someday!
She: There's nothing wrong with that rug! You need to pick up your big feet!
He: I do pick up my feet! I just hate rugs. I hate this rug in the dining room, too!
She: You don't like anything I do, do you?...
You can see where this is headed.
I've witnessed lots of fights between husband and wife, and almost all of them quickly get off the subject and on to old complaints, gripes, mistakes, pet peeves, etc. I've seen quite a few where the battlers could not tell you what actually generated the first hot words. Somehow it would be nice if we could teach young people how to keep from falling into this trap. I know that my husband has taught me to "pick my battles," and so I don't get riled up unless it's a really important issue. I just don't let it bother me. I think about something else. I go my own way, and if there's action to be taken, I'll take it later when conditions are calmer.
So I probably miss out on a lot of marrital fun, if you can call fights "fun"...and some people do. My life is a lot calmer, and our relationship is unruffled. I think I'll keep it this way.